When your relationship suddenly ends, people often get so sad and stuck, and often, they don’t want to let people know how much they are hurting. The doubt and fears creep in, and you feel stuck. Although a breakup may have been long overdue, it’s hard for some people to ask for help since they are often embarrassed about their situation. The most important thing to do first is to choose friends or a coach that is trustworthy and unconditionally caring as you go through a difficult transition.
But remember, if you are going to re-enter the dating game, you need to get advice from people who are optimistic about dating and avoid people who can make you feel like dating is a nightmare!
In the last 30 years of working with singles in all phases, I have seen many people suffer too long while some never move on after a breakup. Many of my clients have held onto their anger and pain and built walls so high it’s almost impossible to help them to trust in love again. And typically, their friends often can’t give them advice for fear of hurting their feeling or lack of experience in the fast-paced world of the dating game.
It’s vital that the people they confide in can keep confidential information to themselves and provide a safe space to express their feelings. Be careful about sharing your deep feelings and pain with people who may not keep your intimate details to themselves.
When you move in the direction and set new intentions to open yourself up to love again, the doors and people often magically support you. I talk with so many suddenly single people who are still ruminating over the past (even years after a divorce or breakup.)
When you are not living in the present, time flies by, and suddenly, you realize something must shift in your heart to regain the faith to keep forging ahead. Or you will keep meeting unavailable people and wonder what is wrong with you.
My work helps so many people heal by examining their patterns and ultimately, they can shift to see that they had unconscious blocks in their way that kept sabotaging them. The only reason I know this is because I had huge blocks around trust after being betrayed by some of the men I dated, and I thought I could change their ways! Sound familiar? After years of studies of the mind and reading many books and working with thousands of singles, I share the path I used to open my heart after having doubts about finding real love after seeing the pain of the many divorces and scandals in my family lineage.
I saw so much suffering with close relatives that used to come to discuss their trials and pain in our kitchen when I was a little girl. I absorbed beliefs that destroyed my faith in love at a young age. What about you?
I honestly believe that those experiences led me to my first career as a cosmetologist and wedding consultant to help others to build their confidence and to look fabulous for their special wedding day. I often saw people who didn’t seem ready to marry and were pushed by their families to tie the knot! After over 30 years in the dating industry, some of my most important messages for people going through transitions are to:
- Be gentle with yourself as you are reinventing.
- Be100% honest with yourself and examine your dating patterns.
- Write down all the people that you dated in the past and ask yourself.
- Was there a pattern of dating the same type of person repeatedly?
- Did you stay in a relationship for too long for fear of being alone and you weren’t fully present?
- Did you ever have any healthy role models?
- Have you healed from your breakup, or are you still bitter or shut down?
If you find yourself still in pain or suffering from a separation or divorce and are ready to Open your Heart to Love again, Contact Me, and I promise I can help you to break free from the past and design a new future! It’s my passion and life mission! Ignite your heart with the tools to regain your power and forgive the past.
Renée Piane, the Love Designer & Relationship Reinvention expert, is a master at connecting people and one of the top influencers in the love industry. She works with high powered executives and celebrities who are looking for their ultimate match or are going through transitions in their relationships. Her books Get Real about Love, Love Mechanics, and The Art of Flirting with Life: How to Make Great Connections for Love, Friendships and Business have transformed many lives. As the pioneer of Rapid Dating/Networking, Renée matched thousands of people for love and business over the last thirty years. She was featured on CNN, NBC, ABC, The Today Show, The Wall Street Journal, The Los Angeles Times & The New York Times.
To learn more about Renée, visit www.ReneePiane.com.